Posts by Emma Hart
Last ←Newer Page 1 2 3 4 5 Older→ First
-
Up Front: The Up Front Guides:…, in reply to Bart Janssen,
Can we make this thread the cricket one? That wouldn't make me a bad person ... would it?
I'm hardly going to argue. Waiting on the challenge...
-
Capture: Flash Cars, in reply to Christopher Dempsey,
I automatically assumed that the boys in the back of the picture around the car were busy texting
At first glance I had assumed about four of them were rolling cigarettes.
-
Up Front: The Up Front Guides:…, in reply to Sacha,
Either the gap is long or it isn't.
Our perception of the passage of time, though, is extraordinary subjective.
-
Up Front: The Up Front Guides:…, in reply to Ian Dalziel,
something goes beyond sex and deeper into the spirit of being.
See, it's my perception that sex goes all the way to the core of my spirit of being.
-
Up Front: The Up Front Guides:…, in reply to Bart Janssen,
A bit unfair, I read that as describing the feeling that many men have.
The point of the quote was that I get that, and it's not unique to men. It's a feeling I had until Susan pointed out what might have been biasing my selection.
-
Up Front: The Up Front Guides:…, in reply to Tom Beard,
So, if we’re going to investigate such old saws as “women are more attracted to taken men than single men”, it would be best to have some actual data, and neither repeating “many men would agree” nor relying on an individual’s counterexample would shed any light on it.
Yes, very much so. Otherwise you end up spending time trying to deduce the mechanism by which scheduling a cricket test makes it rain.
To quote myself:
I was talking to my best friend once about the flood of interest I’d attracted after becoming engaged. Suddenly there seemed to be interesting men everywhere, being interested. “Where were they all when I was single?” I whinged.
“Right,” she said, “and when would that have been?”
So, while I still attract interest from men even though I'm in a relationship, I don't really have much to compare it with - especially a fair comparison, because the last time I was single for more than six days I was nineteen.
Some of them have tattoos. Or so I’m told.
My jaw hurts from keeping my mouth shut.
-
Speaker: Eat, Drink, Rebuild, in reply to Ian Dalziel,
and what! No mention of the excellent Bodhi Tree now situated at 397-399 Ilam Road, Christchurch, near Clyde Rd roundabout.
I did not know that, thanks Ian. Fabulous.
Over our side, Alvarados is open again, right by Lancaster Park.
-
Up Front: The Up Front Guides:…, in reply to Steve Barnes,
Ah but...
I did say "many men would agree..." so it is hardly surprising that you don't or do, as it were.So, just to be clear, you're only open to listening to men's opinions about what women do?
-
Up Front: The Up Front Guides:…, in reply to Isaac Freeman,
There is a reasonable body of research indicating that this is the single most important factor in starting relationships. More than anything else, people are attracted to people who seem to be attracted to them.
But... but... it's still too early for how much this hurts my brain. This is like "the most common reason for having a caesarian is having already had one".
So, person A feels attracted to person B because B is displaying attraction to them. But what made B attracted to A? That comes first, it has to.
I suspect that actually it's an incremental layering of small ambiguous interpretable gestures. Was that a look? Did he brush my arm on purpose? Was that double entendre deliberate?
I love flirting. I see it as... something people build together, between them. A good 'click' with flirting is like a kind of symbiosis - there's a joy in being able to communicate with someone in half-unspoken things.
-
Up Front: The Up Front Guides:…, in reply to Sacha,
flirting is all about strategic ambiguity. Deliberate uncertainty.
I think it's about... creating doubt from a position of certainty. I have to be reasonably sure of myself to start flirting. Then it's something I tend not to do by halves.
A friend once told me (it's kind of fabulous having lots of men-who-sleep-with-women friends)... wait. Let me actually find it:
You also have what I referred to once as "Emma's mysterious fuck-me vortex." which is NOT A EUPHEMISM but rather reflects the air of .. availability, I guess ... that you tend to project. Your use of body language suggests that you are interested. So to speak. In Everyone. With a capital E. I'm sure this helps attract people - people are always going to respond more strongly to someone they think is interested in them. But I also think it helps get you into trouble, that you really could maybe do without. It's not a BAD thing, it's part of your personality, but I can see how it could cause issues.
So, then, if I AM interested, it layers on top of that, almost to the point of self-parody. I have no idea I'm doing it.