Posts by BenWilson

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  • Hard News: Blended!,

    I'm sure I've scrambled for Jaffas at that venue before, sometime in the 70s.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report

  • Southerly: Refugee Status,

    You have mixed feelings, Joe? Were the bullies perhaps some rotten apples and the turfing of the entire family OTT in hindsight?

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report

  • Busytown: The shakes,

    Would it be equal to the "nation mourns" bullshit that will flow when the All Blacks get knocked out of the Rugby World Cup next year?

    I very much doubt it will be equal. I'm sure some media will ham up the feelings of bitterness in NZ but we'll get over it pretty quick, and whoever does win will be congratulated rather than bombed back into the stone age.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report

  • Field Theory: Philosophy and the Mobile…,

    Honne and Tatemae, Jack.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report

  • Field Theory: Philosophy and the Mobile…,

    linger that sounded like the perfect opportunity just to choose the name you like best. I'd have picked something like "Strong Gentle Man" in kanji.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report

  • Southerly: Refugee Status,

    I checked my emergency kit last week, and found all my water and food had long since passed its use-by date. But the toilet paper lasts forever. It also weighs nothing.

    I did, however, realize my house contains enough alcohol to keep the family alive for weeks.

    Makes me think that a better strategy than a dedicated emergency kit is simply to always keep a buffer of supplies. This also has the advantage of being a more cost effective way to buy food - when you see discounts, buy them and store them separately. Only applies to storable items, of course.

    Edit: This strategy also helps with the most likely kind of emergency, one that used to happen to me about once a month - running out of stuff at inconvenient times. I keep a spare, full bottle of gas for the BBQ at all times now. I'm thinking during the blackouts after a disaster that could prove to be very valuable.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report

  • Field Theory: Philosophy and the Mobile…,

    I seem to recall that the Samurai also had the right to sign their fellow contractors neck with their swords any time they felt like it, so taking responsibility with a real signature probably didn't seem worthwhile.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report

  • Hard News: The Orcon Great Blend 2010:…,

    I had a really good time. Met only about half of the people I wanted to meet, but that's only because there are so many, and the surprise meetings were every bit as fun as the anticipated ones.

    What a venue, I always said as a kid it would be a great place for one of those multi-room parties, although at the time I envisaged a 20s style affair with black tie and a lot of smoking, rather than a futuristic occasion with wifi tweeting, full of people drawn together by the internet.

    Plenty of good solid conversations, but the comment of the night for me, the one that reverberated in my head all weekend, a parting shot: "Don't be a stranger". That's what makes PAS work - we aren't happy being strangers. Let's do more parties. It would probably be nice if Russell could kick back right from the start for once!

    To the author of that comment, I want to know, honestly: Do I still talk more than I listen?

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report

  • Southerly: Refugee Status,

    I think I'd prefer to be on all fours, for a lot of reasons. It's a basic recovery position, has stability, can move in every direction, is resistant to shock. It could be painful to the knees on a hard floor, though. Mind you a hard floor would probably find lots of ways to be painful during an earthquake.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report

  • Up Front: Day Five,

    Or it's been good for mine, anyhow. Also helpful has been distracting myself with DVDs, books, short walks, tai chi on the lawn, anything that changes the focus, even for a little while.

    Yes, folks, be aware that different people deal with shock in different ways, and if someone isn't talking about it, sometimes that's the way they want it. I haven't been through an earthquake but did endure 3 weeks of trauma when my first child was born, and I found that one of the things that really comforted me was "getting back to normality", living in a hospital (and I guess a busted up home with things not working with every routine in your life disrupted) can make you go nuts.

    So I'd try to do things that I would do any normal day, and try to do them in the normal way. Actually doing work is a very good idea, and Emma and David are wise to write, because that is what they do. Socialize with people, and if you don't want to, don't talk about the quakes, talk about sport or politics or whatever it is you talk about. Play your sport, read your books, browse the net. At least some of the time - reality will assert itself anyway when it's time to step up for the next round of crisis coping.

    The shock processing could take quite a while, months or even years. I don't think I really allowed myself to grieve for about a year, because during that year there was just too much to do.

    I'm not saying don't talk if you want to talk. Just that respecting how other people cope is important. For some people, everyone calling constantly to find out how you are is really nice. For me it was not, and I took the advice of the hospital social worker and delegated the job of keeping everyone informed to my mother-in-law, so that I wouldn't have to go over the same thing afresh 15 times every day, just once to her, and then to anyone I chose. Some of the people were a little bit gutted about that, because they really wanted to talk to me. But that was what they wanted, not what I wanted. And being a bit selfish about your own (and your closest loved ones) mental health is sometimes quite justified.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report

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