Field Theory: 25 Things you need to be a man
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In any case, starting today I am going to go through the list of 25 things set down in Popular Mechanics, and I am going to master all of them.
Hadyn, I am hiring a trailer this weekend if you'd like to try out number 2 on the list?
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Dude, you read "Popular Mechanics" - that's pretty freakin' manly.
Me? I skate with an all-womens roller-derby league and use a pseudonym on occasion. I suspect this disqualifies me from any pretence of manliness.
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I'm still practicing "maneuvering a car out of a skid". The first time I ended up facing the wrong way in a ditch (my grandmother's cousin's husband pulled my car out with his tractor. Now there was a man).
The second time I ended up facing the wrong way against a snow bank one metre from the drop off the Mt Hutt road. This prompted me to add "regularly check tread on tyres" to my manly list.
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Surely changing a car tyre has got to be in there?
Again, I'm not insinuating that people of the inwards-genital persuasion can't do this ... just observing that I feel strong and manly when I've had opportunity to prove that I can lift a tyre, use a jack, remove the nuts and get my hands dirty. And sweat. Or something.
Roar.
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I feel strong and manly when I've had opportunity to prove that I can lift a tyre, use a jack, remove the nuts...
Well, someone had to say it.
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Jed, me too.
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Surely changing a car tyre has got to be in there?
You know what, you're right. Consider it added.
Dude, you read "Popular Mechanics" - that's pretty freakin' manly.
I read the occasional link that comes through my science blog feeds - that's much much less manly
Hadyn, I am hiring a trailer this weekend if you'd like to try out number 2 on the list?
Sigh if only that were innuendo. Fine.
I'm still practicing "maneuvering a car out of a skid".
You know I might need a photographer for this...
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The manliest thing I've learned how to do lately is fillet a fish. There's death, blood and sharp knives, what's not to like?
I love fishing, and it's important to be able to prepare those scaley little guys for eating if you're going to drag them out of their environment and stick a knife in thier head. Got a great crash course on a work charter boat fishing trip when me and the chaps filleted about 60 snapper one Saturday night.
It makes me feel pretty bloody manly knowing that if anyone was to say "I've got this fish, but don't know what to do with it", I can truthfully say "Do you want me to fillet that fucker?". That's awesome.
Plus, sports blogging has to be pretty manly, would you say Hadyn?
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I'm not a fan of prescriptive lists when it comes to human people. They always seem to end in the smugness of those who conform to the script.
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I thought I was ok at number 2. But had the opportunity yo try reversing a qud bike with trailer the other day. Talk about instant, unstoppable jack-knifing and complete loss of man points...
That was before I failed the torque wrench test (!= monkey wrench then?).
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Love the recursive dissonance of a list of manly things when creating lists is the manly thing.
Yrs, Ms Nicola Hornby
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Plus, sports blogging has to be pretty manly, would you say Hadyn?
I suppose, it doesn't really involve a lot of "doing stuff" though (except maybe eating chips)
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So is the not eating quiche thing now officially dated?
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As a man I would suggest it is your duty to be willing to eat most anything that vaguely falls into the 'food' category. (And quite a few that obviously don't...) There was never an embargo on quiche, even if it was pronounced 'kwitch' on occasion.
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You mean stripping and cleaning some umpteen dozen WW I vintage rifles after school was not punishment for wagging Cadets, but an attempt to enhance my manliness ...
(I know, I know, it shows my age) -
It makes me feel pretty bloody manly knowing that if anyone was to say "I've got this fish, but don't know what to do with it", I can truthfully say "Do you want me to fillet that fucker?". That's awesome.
Then you pull out your fileting knive and sharpen it (no. 4) , select a good wine (no.1) , then cook it (no.2).
You should get extra points for combining tasks.
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I recall it once being suggested that the difference between a boy and a man was:
1 - buys contraceptives without blushing.
2 - is not embarrassed by tampons (I remember seeing a guy from Burnham in army fatigues with tampons in his trolley (presumably for his wife) and thinking - he was totally a man, not a wimp).Maybe it's about confidence.
Perhaps theres another: is able to be patient and teach a 6 year old how to do something practical.
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<quote>Plus, sports blogging has to be pretty manly, would you say Hadyn?
I suppose, it doesn't really involve a lot of "doing stuff" though (except maybe eating chips)</quote>
And drinking whisky. Very manly.
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manliness is all about doing, rather than being. So you can't "be a man"
You have to "do a man"? :)
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gah, failing to correctly nest your quote tags is imminently un-manly.
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"eminently"
giving up...
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Looking at the list how about:
- open a bottle of wine using a corkscrew
Or given the "dismantle a gun" type things perhaps "open a beer bottle without an opener" would be more that line.
Maybe that's more for the list "25 things a gentleman should be able to do"
Thinking about alternate lists, there could also be:
25 things a woman should be able to do
25 things a lady should be able to do?
25 things a grown-up should be able to do? -
How to Keep Your Volkswagen Alive; A Manual of Step-By-Step Procedures for the Compleat Idiot.
Step 1: Buy a Toyota.
Step 2: Convert Volkswagen into quirky bar/gazebo/chicken coop.If you call that living ... :)
Probably says a lot that I loved the book and idolised the cars, then proceeded to buy a Corolla once I actually got my license.
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Sports blogging definitely falls into that Hemmingway / Jack London category, ie 'It may LOOK like sitting slumped in front of a keyboard isn't particularly manly in itself, but I'm just ABOUT to go kill a bear, a marlin or eat some chips'.
As a newish parent I'm going to add 'deal with your first born when they're pissing, shitting and spewing simultaneously without freaking out'.
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I'm still practicing "maneuvering a car out of a skid".
Living in Canada, I've had the, ahem, the occasional opportunity to practice this over winter.
If anyone has any advances on: "take foot off accelerator, point wheel in direction you'd ideally be going, resist urge to slam on brakes really hard, hope for the best" ... well, I'm all ears.
Get a car unstuck
Similarly difficult in my experience, unless you just happen to have the right equipment and - hopefully - a much larger vehicle handy. There's pretty much no skill required if both those criteria are fulfilled.
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