Posts by Emma Hart
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People with the same name as me posting their psuedo political ramblings to the Letters to the Editor page of the Herald.
Like this
My mother wrote a letter to the Timaru Herald to explain that she wasn't the Audrey Hart who kept writing letters to the Timaru Herald.
I find it really pleasing that the top google result for my name is this chick.
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Donna Tart's "The Secret History"; which is divided into two parts but contains just one event.
I loved "The Secret History". But then, I can remember being at a party with a group of friends and reaching the unanimous conclusion that yes, [character from TSH] was exactly like [dear friend who now works for the Ministry of (Redacted)]. So there may be mitigating circumstances there.
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And: The Eye of Argon: Worst fantasy short story ever. Conventions hold reading competitions: you have to see how far you can get before you start laughing..
I got to here:
"Only after you have kissed the fleeting stead of death, wretch!" returned Grignr.
One year a friend gave me a copy of Rogue, by Fabio. We had a competition to see who could get the furtherest through it without
a)hurling it across the room
b)hurling -
I think it was Victor Hugo that, I was told, made his maid take his clothes away until he'd written a certain number of pages.
Sounds like a fun game. Not sure how productive it would be, but I am willing to give it a try. Now, I'll just need to get me a maid...
Another example might be the random if enthusiastic discourse on parisian architecture in the middle of The Hunchback of Notre Dame.
I could certainly have done without all the detailing of Russian farming techniques in Anna Karenina.
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If you have to read it then it won't be fun.
Au contraire. I loved some of the stuff I was forced to read. Even the really heavy Victorian essays had some interest. I think the main problem with Robinson Crusoe was that it was shite.
Crusoe swims naked to the wreck then fills his pockets with biscuits
then yells 'Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker' and shoots all the cannibals. This cross-over idea is growing on me.
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Whoah, that's so wrong for so many reasons, the latest of which has to be Wall-E.
I knew when I wrote that I was going to Get Letters. Because of course it isn't true, it's a huge generalisation. It was just, y'know, you just crashed a truck into a helicopter and I am bored shitless.
Lord of the Rings sucks ass.
Phew, that felt good.
That's it, let it all out. Also, does it what.
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My partner and I taped the rugby, and due to a whole bunch of things, didn't get to watch it until quite late on Sunday afternoon - so late that we watched the first half, stopped and watched the netball, then watched the second half.
Switching back to the rugby was like swallowing a fist-full of mogadon.
There was only one injury break in the netball and that was for a genuine injury. Both teams got five-goal runs on without the other side suddenly developing an urgent blister. And that game that stops all the time and has too much whistle? Does NOT have breaks long enough to show a replay. I'd really like TVNZ to work that out.
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who don't know what "decimate" or "literally" means
I was just bitching and whining about this yesterday. It appears now that 'literally' means 'figuratively', and 'virtually' means 'actually'.
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I don't know where to start with that . . .
How about here: an 'O' for 'Obama' is the same backwards as forwards. Honestly, the quality of whackjobs these days...
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Hello, Christchurch? Which is what you get when you build a city on a flat swamp.
Pff, it's a big square, it's perfectly easy. Or at least it would be if someone hadn't decided that it was good urban planning to make the central road grid look like a Union Jack. And then jam a one-way 'system' into it.
You really just need a compass and your eyes. If you want poor people or the sea, drive east. If you want students or the airport, go west. If you want rich people drive towards the hills, and if you want 'town' drive towards the only tall buildings. Dunno what north is for. A complete lap of the city only takes about an hour anyway.
Wellington, meanwhile, is a freaking nightmare. I just got the hang of it and you shifted all the streets or reversed the one-way system or something.