Random Play: Modern Life is Rubbish
148 Responses
First ←Older Page 1 2 3 4 5 6 Newer→ Last
-
What is the point of crossing live to a reporter standing in front of a building, telling us what might or might not be going on inside that building, when exactly the same information could have been conveyed from the studio.
Dude, you haven't been watching enough TV news. The fashion now is to cross to a reporter who's just randomly outside, in a place with no real relation to the story.
-
Dude, don't be hating on cephalopods.
I'd quite like that on a t-shirt.
-
Yeah, right.
-
In regards to...
Snap - and likewise "in terms of". It's as if the word "about" isn't good enough any more.
Many mistakes seem to come from people using big words or phrases when small ones would do just fine, and when they simply aren't smart enough to successfully embellish for reasons of style or pleasure.
-
-
Or this one
-
Journey instead of "my time on this 'reality' show".
-
Dude, don't be hating on cephalopods.
I'd quite like that on a t-shirt.
RB, your wish is my command
-
Shit things, eh? Or things that give you the shits. I don't much mind if people use words like literally or decimate erroneously. Life's too short. What I do mind is people who take their dog for a walk in an offleash park and the poor bugger is on a leash. Yes, that I mind. Also people who drop rubbish indiscriminately on the ground. Litterers. When the wind blows, the rubbish ends up in our kindergarten garden. Foul.
-
Now, y'see, me, I mind dogs running around loose and dropping rubbish indiscriminately on the ground...
-
Andrew Saville, he's like one of those nodding dogs that belongs on the back shelf of a MKIII Cortina. And what the hell is with those eyebrows?
Toni Street see above. Single-handedly ridding NZ of hairspray, one truckload at a time. -
Julia Roberts -- seriously, what has she ever done to get on the "A-List", let alone remain there all this time? Pretty Woman, that's it. Read any article about her success, no matter how recent, and that's the film that gets mentioned. Twenty years ago she played a hooker with a heart of gold, and Hollywood still swoons over her, while countless other actresses fall by the wayside, due to the poor tactical move of aging past thirty.
Is it her enormous mouth? Do people mistake her for Steve Tyler and assume that if she has a rock band and an acting career she must be special? Are they afraid she'll eat them if she doesn't get decent roles? Answers on the back of a postcard.
-
What I do mind is people who take their dog for a walk in an offleash park and the poor bugger is on a leash.
Speaking as someone who takes his dogs to an offleash park, and doesn't always take them off leash... one of my dogs doesn't always play nicely with other dogs, and having them on leash is preferable to them getting in a fight. Other owners certainly prefer it that way.
-
The Baldwin brothers. Are they a drug cartel or something?
-
People who own cars with an insignia cover for the boot keyhole, but leave the cover flicked up ALL THE TIME
Animals.People who say, 'Oh I'm SOOO jealous' when you tell them you're going on holiday
Apart from the fact that the reason I'm going on holiday is that I worked hard and saved up money, which you could quite reasonably do too, you're not jealous, you're envious. Envy is wanting something someone else has, jealousy is not wanting someone else to have what you've got.Enough now.
-
Julia Roberts ... Is it her enormous mouth?
Of course it is her enormous mouth, (and as with Keira Knightley), enormous eyes too. They say, you must be VERY big, I have to have such a large mouth to accommodate you, and my eyes are popping iin response to you!
-
**People who own cars with an insignia cover for the boot keyhole, but leave the cover flicked up ALL THE TIME**
Animals.Oh God, be it a New Beetle, Alfa Romeo, anything at all... I've been riding through traffic, seen this, and many times have scarce resisted the temptation to reach forward and roll the damn thing down.
-
How, how, how have I missed this thread? This is a hobby of mine! In fact, someone once said to me 'you thrive on hatred, don't you?' I was initially quite insulted, and then realised that learning to love myself - and my intense hatreds of trivial things - was the greatest love of all. (To paraphrase George Benson.)
Firstly some moments of startling recognition:
Sandwiches in Plastic Packs... it's all just bread beyond the first couple of centimetres.
Oh yes. Yes. Opening the sandwich and rearranging the fillings only gets you so far, too. I would like to add soggy bread in sandwiches to the list (a surfeit of tomatoes being the most common culprit). It's just unbearable.
Journey instead of "my time on this 'reality' show".
Completely agreed. 'Journey' makes me flinch with rage.
Ty Pennington from Extreme Home Makeover. This screaming faux-nice emotionally manipulative maniac deserves to be beaten to death with a bag full of navel oranges. Get that fucking loudhailer *away from me*, you TOSSER.
Americans who come to NZ and bitch about how expensive it is compared to Costa Rica or wherever (friends of ours actually did this). OK, so you realise that the reason it's so cheap in some central American countries is because they're *incredibly poor and exploited* and NZ actually has decent working conditions and people have to live here and do not exist just for your bargain shopping expeditions, right? Bah.
Pop-culture snobs. You know, just because I happen to like watching completely ridiculous TV shows does not give you a licence to snark about what an idiot I am. I am capable of analysing and enjoying both high and low culture, you know.
People who say 'exscape'. There is no 'x' in that word.
People who do not stand up for the elderly on public transport. And, moreover, those dickheads who refuse to move their giant shoulder bag from the seat beside them when the bus is getting full. We are all sharing this unpleasant space. Be polite.
Ads being louder than telly programmes. Can someone sort this out please?
There are bound to be more. Like I said, it's a hobby.
-
People who own cars with an insignia cover for the boot keyhole, but leave the cover flicked up ALL THE TIME
Yes! Bloody Nissan Bluebird owners...
Plus, on a related whinge, people in front of you in a queue with the tag sticking out the back of their shirt neck - can't ignore it, risk a slapped face if you tuck it back in for them...People who say 'exscape'
and nucular, and aluminum (I know that one's a legitimate dialectical difference, but I don't care).
-
3410,
I've been waiting for just such a thread, and now that's it's here I can't remember a damn thing I would've bitched about... except:
People who say "Princess Wharf" or "Princess Street".
-
Pop-culture snobs. You know, just because I happen to like watching completely ridiculous TV shows does not give you a licence to snark about what an idiot I am. I am capable of analysing and enjoying both high and low culture, you know.
Yes, yes. It always makes me feel better that one of the friends I share ANTM love with, is a professor of archaeology, and goes on brainy expeditions to Outer Mongolia, and everything.
Ty Pennington from Extreme Home Makeover. This screaming faux-nice emotionally manipulative maniac deserves to be beaten to death with a bag full of navel oranges. Get that fucking loudhailer *away from me*, you TOSSER.
I watch it out of the corner of my eye, cos I quite like some of the families who get fab new houses. Ty, not so much. The most recent episode was particularly painful. A lovely man who saved the last couple of people buried alive at Ground Zero. You can imagine Ty Pennington. In his element he was.
-
I know it goes against the spirit of the thread, but isn't Mucking In a much better show than the yank equivalent you're discussing. All the warm fuzzies but none of the big talking and overacting.
-
People who say 'exscape'
When I was at teachers college (I have 3/4 of a diploma) I had a language tutor who said "execitive" and "aventure" for "exec**u**tive" and "a**d**venture".
those dickheads who refuse to move their giant shoulder bag from the seat beside them when the bus is getting full. We are all sharing this unpleasant space. Be polite.
Especially when I am forcing my squirming kid to sit on my knee so that there's a space beside me and some selfish cow feels she needs a whole seat for her little wee handbag.
-
Whilst I really enjoy a walk on the sardonic side of life, I like to do so in a postive way, where people have actually been pretty clever about it.
Examples of this would include LMAO at
Josh :...forcing the media to start writing stories about "Gategate".
Emma :
My mother wrote a letter to the Timaru Herald to explain that she wasn't the Audrey Hart who kept writing letters to the Timaru Herald.
Whereas picking upon Julia Roberts simply because she has a big mouth is perhaps a bit petty and displaying the tendency to be get personal, particularly as soo many of today's big name stars (eg Paris, Jordan, Posh) are probably in that same 'no talent' category. So why particulalry select the seemingly bland Julia for a bit of a spray? Simply saying you hate 'no talent' celebs & fame-whores is a whole lot less objectionable...and probably PC too.
However, writing a comment about disliking Julia Roberts because you initially thought she had a bigger nose than your own, only for you to discover that Julia's nose is smaller than your's and that's why you dislike her is a step or 2 towards humour, without being PC.
As for me, reality TV and it's overwhelming plastic & celebrity obsessed lameness is my pet hate. Sure there was once a concept that was unique and held value, but the last 5 years worth of reality TV seems simple about maintaining the public's addiction to the pinnacle of trash TV. Maintaining that line of income for lazy producers and production companies that are struggling with decreasing margins and a lack of willingness to pay for a show that has not adopted the low cost approach that is soo in vogue, too (on this occasion I'll stay away from that Copyright discussion). Perhaps Charlie Brooker has said all that needs to be said about this, over and over again.....and again. He's a lucky chap with a seemingly endless stream of crap TV to savagely belittle. (Hey Charlie over here...yeah this way...towards Julie Christie).
Humour as a weapon is excellent!
-
I know it goes against the spirit of the thread, but isn't Mucking In a much better show than the yank equivalent you're discussing. All the warm fuzzies but none of the big talking and overacting.
It's way better, Sacha.
Post your response…
This topic is closed.