Posts by Colin
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I find all the discussion around when you can and can't hit a child creepy - is it prevention or correction - wtf!.
Larry Baldock is particularly creepy and evil - virtually frothing at the mouth at the prospect of more freedom to hit children.
The whole tenet has been about the rights of parents, not children. Otherwise we'd see a return to smacking in schools and pre-schools as part of good teaching practice.
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On the hitting kids thing, a recurring theme on talk-back is of parents who are against repealing Section 59 starting to talk about how their kids could dob them in for smacking them. Could happen I suppose, but it makes you wonder why, if a few good loving smacks produces nice respectful kids, why such parents are now feeling so threatened. Hah!
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Yay Deborah. You summed it all up beautifully.
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Hmm, as I've pointed out before, it becomes interesting when you apply the justification for smacking children (diminished understanding of the consequences of their actions, have limited insight and are not responsive to other means of persuasion including verbal), to smacking elderly people.
When care givers are caught doing this, no-one has a problem with the law coming down on them. Why the distinction?
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Over the last couple of days the discussion has turned to debating the merits or otherwise of different ways of inflicting (physical or psychological) pain in order to 'teach'.
The power of language to spin these forms is nver far away ('teaching devices etc). Some years ago, I believe a a Christian bookshop was selling a device called 'Winnie the Whale' - basically an approved piece of wood for beating children, (don't you just love Christians?)
Anyway parents, ask yourself, what you are really doing when hitting children. Whether used routinely, or as a last resort 'when all else fails', its about breaking their will.
Its sucess (or at least your ability to continue believing in its success) is inthe child responding in a way that reinforces the illusion that (at least for now) their will is broken, and the approriate power balance between the two parties preserved (you have the power, theirs is broken). I stopped smacking my daughter, when, still at a very young age (about 4 or5 ), upon receiving a smack, she stood up tall, looked me right in the eye, and said 'What do you think you're doing? You don't hit little children!'
What do you say to that?
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Stephen, what you seem to be saying is that you've missed the point. I agree, you have.
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3410 has conceded that smacking an elderly senile person, (even if behaving in ways that would incur smacking if they were a child) would simply be disrepectful. This is a MAJOR POINTthat needs to be emphasied. Children must be RESPECTED - despite their transgressions. As adults and parents, it is our duty to respect our children.
We all know what happens to children who are not respected - they have limited self respect and this can be traced as the source of so many problems. Ask a child how they feel when being smacked - it destroys their self esteem. Ask the inmates of our prisons about how much they believe their parents respected them (and incidently whether being lovingly smacked contributed to this).
This also raises the issue of 'cultural' norms. Lets be honest, cultures where the emphasis is on chidren having to respect their elders, and not the other way around, are the same cultures where smacking and abuse are significant problems. Like religion, culture should never be an excuse for hitting children.
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Nick, I imagine the Christian brothers at Marylands (Christchurch) would share the view expressed in your last sentence. Thank goodness the law stepped in. A good arguement for the bill if ever there was one...
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PS Is hitting children is OK by your God? (in a loving way of course)
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Craig, perhapsyou can help me - I honestly don't know the difference between a customary observance and a mortal sin, and I'm afraid I don't know the difference between just annoying God, and really pissing him off. Can you please list all the things I can get away with, and the mortal ones that I should avoid.