Posts by Deborah
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I think I realised that it was truly the house that taste forgot when I got to the photo of the bar.
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Well, to save repetition, here's the link to the discussion at The Hand Mirror: BMI at factor in refusing residency.
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My sympathies to Bob's family, and friends, among whom I count us.
Time for that Births, Deaths, Civil Unions and Other Events of Interest column, Russell? T'would be nice to have a place to gather to celebrate and mourn. I realise that things are a busy at present... with s92A and all that, but maybe soon?
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Hey! I voted for all three of those.
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I haven't been able to find anything quite right here. There are perfectly palatable sweet potatoes, but they don't have the same texture as kumara. I wonder if the climate (45.7 degrees today!) has something to do with it.
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Yes, well, we just spent nearly a month back in the old country, and I want to come back forever. Australia is an easy place to live in (notwithstanding the 43 degree day we got here today - faaarrrkkkk!), and there do seem to be more opportunities here, and it's a wealthier society, albeit not by much. But I miss the changeable skies and the rain and tui and pohutakawa and green and kumara and kowhai and riroriro, and all that. Quite simply, I want to be at home, not just in a house and a street and a city, but home in a place where I belong.
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And why do people make money from respinning ancient philosophies ? ie it's not what happens to you in life, it's how you react to it.
Indeed. That's as good an epitome of early Stoicism, as taught by Xeno roughly 2200 years ago, as any I have seen.
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We busy packing up the kids and the car to drive from New Plymouth to Auckland in order to catch a flight back to Adelaide early tomorrow, so I don't really have time to make a nuanced comment, nor will I have internet access again until tomorrow evening (oh noes) so I can't stick around to keep on discussing this
BUT
Yes, I agree that female-on-male domestic violence is just as unacceptable as male-on-female domestic vilnce. However it's worth remembering that it's not just about relationships between individuals, but that it occurs in a social context too, and that the social context in which we live is one where by and large, men have more power than women, as a result of the myriad tiny interactions we all enage in, and the history we all share. Male-on-female domestic violence occurs in that context of gendered power relations. And perhaps that's why until recently (say 30 years ago?), police really did buy into the idea that it was just a domestic, and so not a problem that they needed to address. It was also why neighbours wouldn't report doemstic violence, wouldn't get involved - it was a private matter between a man and his wife. That's one hell of a history to learn to break away from.
Having said that, we do still seem to accept female-on-male domestic violence, and wonder why he doesn't just get out. But I wonder if the social context is different i.e. it's not tied into society-wide power structures, and female-on-male domestic violence is still seen as a matter for individuals to sort out. Hence our reluctance to even acknowledge the problem, maybe.
I think, 'tho I'm not sure, that studies and statistics show that male-on-female violence results in more physical damage to the victim than female-on-male violence - does someone know more about this? Of course, that's just a brute fact of nature - on average, men are physically stronger than women, so you would expect a greater degree of physical harm.
And that's without getting into same-sex relationships. For reasons to do with the work I was doing this year, I spent quite a bit of time talking about domestic violence with my hairdresser, a very smart and able young man who had himself been involved in a violent relationship, which eventually, his parents had dragged him out of, pleading with him not to go back to his abusive boyfriend. Again, there seemed to be a huge power dynamic issue involved in it, or so he told me.
So there you are - some vague hand-waving thoughts from me, and I'm sorry that they are not more coherent. In summary, I'm suggesting that male-on-female violence is more closely tied to societal power structures than female-on-male violence. That is, there is a huge gender dimension to this issue. But I'm offering this as a point for discussion, not a finished thesis. And again, sorry for not sticking around to talk some more.
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Great post, Russell.
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I got a book with the standard mezzo-soprano musical literature, complete with sing-along CDs. That will be nice for the neighbours. And I got Stephanie Alexander's Cook's Companion, 2nd edition, which I have coveted ever since it came out.
The children didn't wake us up until 6.05am.