Posts by David Haywood
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BenWilson wrote:
I soon discovered why people might have a problem with it. They shit everywhere.
I should've mentioned that the ducks I was feeding were in the Avon. The neighbour's family had suffered a nasty bout of 'flu, which they blamed on the ducks -- and, by extension, which they blamed on me for not allowing the ducks to starve to death in the cold winter of 1995.
octopusgrrl wrote:
After a few nights of this, I was starting to lose it from sleep-dep so the gorgeous throng was met with the sight of a near-sighted craze-haired woman in a tatty dressing gown almost in tears pleading with them to turn the music down.
I've only once had the nerve to complain to a neighbour, and that was the ones who accused me of dobbing them into CYFS (which I suspect was the basis for their suspicions). They were burning wet wood (I think) on the fire, we had a baby of only a few weeks old, and the smoke inside our house was so bad that it kept setting off our smoke alarms (usually just when Bob had dropped off for one of his rare naps). I thought that I was very polite, but they didn't seem too pleased.
... until the landlord attempted to move into our living room...
Now that really sounds like a story that should be shared.
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Glad that this piece has provided a little mirth on a wet Thursday...
Rob Hosking wrote:
Right, that's the last time I read a Hayward [sic] piece while drinking tea. Straight down the nostrils.
Oh, you can laugh, Hosking, but I still feel indignant every time I think of this incident. I only wish I'd thought of something clever to say, such as: "don't be so fucking stupid", instead of standing there in mute astonishment.
It made it terribly awkward to feed the ducks, as I then had to avoid times when my neighbour (from about 75 metres down the road) wouldn't be walking past. And when you can't feed ducks whenever you like then there's not much enjoyment left in life, is there?
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jb wrote:
Not wearing a cycle helmet has positive outcomes for the public health system... I begin to realize that I am completely and utterly crap at explaining any of this. Sorry folks!
Okay, I suppose I was asking for a whole bunch of sarcasm like that. Although, of course, I'd point out that your premise is completely wrong since it fails to take into account the potential economic productivity of the cyclists (but, yes, I know it's a joke).
I have 17 other things I should be doing, but the re-emergence of this thread reminded me that I hadn't responded to Amy's question below (tried to do it on the radio but we ran out of time).
Amy Gale wrote:
On the subject of correlation vs causation, it occurs to me that the drop in cycling-as-transport could also be related to the introduction of Japanese used car imports, which happened at about the same time as the bike helmet legislation and the education campaigns that preceded it.
The studies in NZ haven't looked at either Smeed's law or the health effects of people who've stopped cycling. The NZ work purely compares the cost of the cycle helmets with the cost of the injuries that might otherwise have occured (without helmets). Needless to say that there is a lot of debate about what could have been prevented, and how to figure in the existing trends for a decrease in injury rates. But I haven't found any papers claiming that the NZ law has had a cost benefit for adults, even under this simplistic comparison.
Overseas studies have looked at Smeed's law and the rest. See the article I linked to previously.
And here's a link to a Guardian article about (some) British schools banning cycling:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/2009/sep/08/cycling-to-school
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Well, this is certainly my sort of review. If I didn't know how busy you were, I'd cry 'More!' and similar such exhortations to spend all your spare time writing for us...
What a shame that there is no NZ periodical that publishes reviews of a decent length. Perhaps you should start one. I could see a website with a monthly print-on-demand version that people could buy (or subscribe to). That way readers such as myself could go back to re-read -- and gloatingly fondle -- each issue. We even have the software at PA already.
I remembered the trip to Mark Twain's house in Hartford, also a shrine to a dead child, after which our older child, then three, had wailed "I don't want to die and people put our things into a museum!"
I read Twain's autobiography as a child, and felt much the same way. He certainly manages to convey how devastating his children's deaths were...
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Paul Millar wrote:
Never before have I lived in a city where so many adults who should know better judge children by the school zone they live in.
Yes, it's astonishing! I've overheard conversations that seem to consist of nothing but school decile numbers.
At any rate, welcome to Christchurch. I presume you're at UoC? If so, I pop into the English building most days. Should you ever feel in need of a chat about culture shock then drop me a line here.
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... the bits of the Avon I'm familiar with are barely knee deep, so you might have to use poetic licence (or some strategic duckweed) to get your characters decently submerged.
The scene was at the Diamond Harbour jetty, waiting for the ferry to Lyttleton -- so plenty of depth for full submersion.
Now I'm thinking it could have been one of those late-autumn days, unexpectedly hot, when one is suddenly overcome by the urge for a dip. Late autumn has the advantage of allowing me some cold and rain later on in the story.
And if I could get that painting for a cover I'd definitely write a book around it.
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Lovely work, Paul!
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RE: turned-up collars
Megan Wegan wrote:
I asked my mum, who has lived in Canterbury her whole life, and she said she remembers it starting in the '60s, and it was known as a Merivale thing, and a "country wife comes to town" thing.
Thanks, matey! Important background information for yet another story in progress...
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RE: Upper Hutt
chris wrote:
It confounded the stereotypical Upper Hutt missive beautifully.
Ross Mason wrote:
Bastard!
I should perhaps mention that Jennifer is from Upper Hutt -- so just a little in-joke for her there.
Raymond A Francis wrote:
I didn't realise you had met my Chch based sisters David!
Boy, are you ever in trouble if your sisters read this discussion thread (briefly contemplates blackmail)...
Jolisa wrote:
My carefully repressed five years in Chch is flooding back, in an insidiously unstoppable and well-mannered way, like the Avon after a particularly unCantabrian bout of rain, or a First Four Ships matron sweeping into Ballantynes...
So sorry about that, Jolisa. If only you were back in NZ then the ACC might be able to help with the cost of your counselling! I have sympathy.
Very Rosamond Lehmann, somehow. Very nice. Maybe put a riverine skinny-dip in the sequel, just for me?
Unlike, Jane Austen, whose praises I may have sung to Dr Creon on one or two occasions, I can disclaim any influence from Rosamond Lehmann since I have not only never read her, but I have also never heard of her. But I shall now look her up.
I have another similar-ish story at first-draft stage, which did feature a skinny dip until I decided to change it from summer to winter. But maybe I shall have to go back and use the UNDO button. I shall do my best to cater to your 'literary' needs (do you prefer men or women? I had one of each before).
By the way, Kathryn Ryan singled out your (and Giovanni Tiso's) comments on the cycle helmet legislation as being very sensible and she "completely agreed with them". All the literary Ph.D.s ganging up on me...
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Creon Upton wrote:
You regard your readership as an ignorant lot, David?
Oh, not at all (and sorry, Kyle, if it came across that way). I just meant that I'd had some confused emails on this line, and wondered if I'd been too obscure. Apologies for any inadvertent offence -- none intended, I assure you!
Ironically, though, the non-fictional Sarah did leave me in the lurch one night back in 1991...
This is fully in accordance with my scientific investigations that established the Laws of Doctor Creon (LDC):
1LDC: Everybody knows Dr Creon.
2LDC: Cherchez la femme.
Anyway, a fine story, Dr Controversy. Keep them coming.
Thanks, dude!