Posts by Emma Hart

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  • Up Front: Walking Through the Ruins,

    Never use professional movers unless you're heavily insured

    We might have considered it, if it hadn't been for friends of ours who did it when they moved a couple of months ago. The movers were six hours late turning up and the whole experience way too stressful.

    We have a rented truck, a long weekend, and a bunch of friends of varying degrees of burliness.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Up Front: Walking Through the Ruins,

    I have an original orangey-yellow 1980s 'Women Can Do Anything' shirt

    Unable to throw out: my large white t-shirt with over-sized black lettering that says 'GO-GO'.

    No fluoro fingerless gloves, but.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Up Front: Walking Through the Ruins,

    I have a drawer full of old t-shirts, none of which still fit - but I can't throw them away - I wonder what a 25 year old HART shirt is worth ....

    I just got rid of a bunch, including my 'large breasts aren't everything' t-shirt. With the harshest cull I could manage, Karl and I still have four drawers of t-shirts between us.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Up Front: Walking Through the Ruins,

    Interesting turn of phrase that.

    At the time of the pregnancy I was married, but not to the child's father. My husband and I officially separated about six months before I got pregnant, and about eight months after my relationship with the child's father started.

    It was complicated. Given my family didn't know the two relationships had a substantial overlap, they were a bit freaked about the abrupt pregnancy. (I really wish we'd had the term 'polyamorous' at the time. As we didn't, we had to make do with 'bitch slut from hell'.)

    We divorced while I was pregnant with my second. My ex-husband is a lovely man who's remarried and has a gorgeous little girl. Child's father and I are still together after nearly fifteen years, and we underwent civil unification nearly three years ago. I think.

    and you start screaming things down the phone like, "I don't care what the computer says, it's wrong. You're wrong. My life is wrong."

    My partner's call to the power company yesterday involved the phrase 'wait a minute, why do you need to know who my next of kin are?'.

    I so hear you about the sadness of leaving gardens. I have done it too often. The one I left in December 2007 was at the stage where I knew it would look beautiful in spring 2008, right about now.

    *sigh* My poppies have just come out. They're exactly the same vibrant red as the huge climbing rose I planted them under. Going into that bit of the garden right now makes me cry.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Up Front: Walking Through the Ruins,

    Oh! This reminds me - I'd better make sure my FIE send me the beta videotape of this!

    I am not impressed with the Beeb's shenanigans over the scheduling of QI this year. I had to make do with Stephen 'I'm a national fucking treasure' Fry on Never Mind the Buzzcocks.

    Basic rules of shifting is rather like PJ O'Rourke's travel rules
    1. never run out of whisky
    2. never run out of whisky

    For our household, you substitute 'gin'. That's not a bad rule all round.

    I see you're an experienced hand in suburban guerilla tatics...

    The yoghurt and Space Invader thing was the FTW from a discussion after my good friend's ex-girlfriend tried to run him over. It just seemed like she wasn't really applying herself.

    I spent about a week in various states of impotent rage while people put things in the wrong places

    I'm currently struggling to walk. And you know how I am with other people doing things wrong. Still, if I've had an embollism by Sunday, I won't need to work out which box has the gin in it. (It's the one labelled 'piss'.)

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Up Front: Walking Through the Ruins,

    I haven't, as yet, packed the matches...

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Field Theory: Good shot old chap,

    I for one have not seen enough of him.

    Get that man an underwear sponsor immediately!

    Lowering the Tone Since November 2006, apparently.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Hard News: Rethinking the EFA,

    when has a gentle mocking done anyone any good - sneak in tonight and leave a fish under his house

    Sweetie, if you can get into his house then the thing to do is to paint the underside of all his furniture with natural yoghurt. It's a slow but insidious revenge.

    If you can't get into his house, you'll just have to fill his car with Space Invader.

    This is not something I advocate, I hasten to add. I'm just saying.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Field Theory: Good shot old chap,

    But, is he one of the 25 hottest men in the world? Depends on who you ask I suppose.

    I think some people haven't seen enough of Richard Kahui. (It amuses the hell out of my partner when I yell 'not the face!' during rugby games.)

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Hard News: Congratulations, Mr Key,

    Well he's full of shit, then. Phil Goff has 3 kids, for starters.

    Charles Chauval's got a couple, and so has Chris Carter. I dunno what they're complaining about.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

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