Posts by Andrew Paul Wood
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Now Michael - that would be "self appointed ambassador of a nation not recognised by any government or the UN, to the leader of an undemocratic military junta." That's pretty queer in itself.
And it really doesn't take much - speaking as someone who knew someone killed in the Bali bombing, you don't have to be Che Guevara to cause carnage, just the will.
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Frankly, I'd be glad if my tertiary students could manage basic English grammar - and that's just the native speakers. Don't be filling their heads with all that shiney flash gobbledigook.
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It wouldn't be hard, NZ drag lacks theatre. All lipsync-ing and no drama.
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I hope you like big tits and cocaine, we're going to auckland.
But until shown proof I'm not prepared to accept that a significantly higher proportion of gay men than straight have obnoxious personalities.
Ok - that's offensive. Camp (Cf. that be-atch Susan Sontag) is a cultural signifier as important (even if sometimes obnoxious) as Te Reo is to Maori. Don't be gettin up in my grilz, colonising my culture caus look at the fist, this bitch is pissed - whatevah
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What puzzles me is why politicians' families are not given media awareness training. Surely that's common sense?
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THE NEW ZEALAND POLICEMAN’S SONG
Things are not as they once were in our New Zealand – Our New Zealand
When everyone was innocent and sweet – ‘cent and sweet
And the common drunk and sometimes petty brigand – petty brigand
Were the worst of crooks a cop would likely meet – likely meet.
Now they arm us with harsh aerosols of pepper – ‘sols of pepper
and electrical devices that can stun – that can stun
The general public treats me like a leper – like a leper
A policeman's lot is not a happy one.
He wheezes when he breaks into a run, to a run
A policeman's lot is not a happy one.When the Mongrel Mob’s not chemicals a-cooking – ‘cals a-cooking
When a senior sergeant’s not accused of rape – ‘cused of rape
When I’m not investigating home invasion – home invasion
I ain’t got time to peel myself a grape – peel a grape
I’m soon dredging valises from the ocean – from the ocean
(Those murdered Chinese students weigh a ton – weigh a ton)
I’m brimming over with heart-felt emotion – felt emotion
A policeman's lot is not a happy one.
He’d rather lie on a beach and sun, beach and sun
A policeman's lot is not a happy one.Much of my time is spent on fines and tickets – fines and tickets.
Don’t think it’s just to gather revenue – revenue.
I’d rather go and copper out in Queensland – out in Queensland.
Oh what is a poor copper s’posed to do? – s’posed to do?
You get accused of being sexist, racist – being racist
Or homophobic when you make a pun – make a pun.
I’ve gone and booked a one-way flight to Brisbane – Flight to Brisbane,
A policeman's lot is not a happy one.
He’s off to live amongst the surf and sun, surf and sun,
A policeman's lot is not a happy one!THE LORD HIGH EXECUTIONER’S SONG
As some day it may happen that a victim must be found,
I've got a little list--I've got a little list
Of society’s offenders better hanged or underground,
And who never would be missed--who never would be missed!
There's the column-spewing gossips who write for Sunday rags--
All people who object when you call your ciggies “fags”--
Pretentious former soap actors presenting arts TV--
Those persons who in making woo infect you with VD--
League players who on tackle-flashing in a bar insist--
They'd none of 'em be missed--they'd none of 'em be missed!CHORUS. He's got 'em on the list--he's got 'em on the list;
And they'll none of 'em be missed--they'll none of
'em be missed.The editors of magazines for women, and the lugs,
I've got them on my list--I've got them on my list
Who once were noble sporting men—till they got done for drugs!
They'd none of 'em be missed--they'd none of 'em be missed.
Then their blonde, big-breasted exes who become celebrities,
SPQR-haunters, Civil servants dripping sleaze;
The Jafas, the provincials, the talking heads of sport,
The traffic wardens, tax collectors, and all others of that sort;
And cross-dressing composers who are percussionists--
I don't think he'd be missed--I'm sure he'd not be missed!CHORUS. He's got her on the list--he's got her on the list;
And I don't think she'll be missed--I'm sure
she'll not be missed!Reality producers, those who text at film and show,
The kaftan-wearing lawyer--I've got him on the list!
Ladies from Wolverhampton flogging dust to make you glow--
They'd none of 'em be missed--they'd none of 'em be missed.
Rock stars who think they’re statesmen of the messianic type,
The arseholes out of marketing who vomit constant hype,
Anti-smoking legislators, and talk-back callers too--
Breastfeeders in restaurants right in front of you.
But it really doesn't matter whom you put upon the list,
For they'd none of 'em be missed--they'd none of 'em be
missed!CHORUS. You may put 'em on the list--you may put 'em on the list;
And they'll none of 'em be missed--they'll none of
'em be missed! -
I'm presuming the Bible
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One is rather reminded of when homosexual Bloomsbury author Lytton Strachey was tried for pacifism during WW2. When asked what he would do if he encountered a German soldier about to rape his mother, he replied "I would endevour to interpose myself."
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Which is a shame. Media handling, PR and communications are pretty vital in changing the world. And I'd hardly call that "a nasty fuckwit getting up in her grill" - it was practically a love tap. It certainly didn't play as anything serious.
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Shall we say half imagination, half the music of the prose. And I'm not sure I want to live in a world where Doris Lessing wins the Nobel Lit prize. Those moralising sci-fi things are dreadful