Posts by Moz
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Hard News: WOTY: The Kindness Scandal, in reply to TracyMac,
Sorry, I wasn't arguing against use of the term, I was trying to question that it's being used more negatively than before. From what I know the collapse from "it's just descriptive" to "it's a horrible (but accurate) slur" happened almost as soon as it was first used. There doesn't seem to be a "proudly TERF" movement the way there's a "Proud Nazi" and "celebrate our genocide/Australian Patriot" movements.
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'TERF', an acronym whose perceived meaning has become markedly more negative over the course of the year
Please excuse my ignorance here, but I don't recall seeing TERF used to describe non-horrible people (but I am, admittedly, old enough that WBW means "women born women", one of the early examples of what's now called TERF activism). Maybe the word has just gone from "What does that mean" to "truly evil scum" in the popular understanding?
Transadvocate explains it and bob help us, UrbanDictionary gives us an example of TERF activism in the definition. TigTog claims it's meant descriptively, but I don't recall TERFs themselves ever taking it as anything other than a slur. And the whole deal upsets me, because it's tied up with some really nasty shit close friends went through/go through. I'll happily line TERF up with national socialist and genocidal murder as "bad ways to describe someone".
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Speaker: Cannabis: make it legal but…, in reply to mark taslov,
the will and the means to grow their own which
I can just imagine the councils being thrilled when a whole bunch of people want to use their community garden spaces to grow pot. What could possibly go wrong?
Even in NZ, not everyone has the space to grow pot. Saying “in a pot, indoors” doesn’t fix the problem, merely changes it. Unless you’re assuming that pot users are entirely middle class or rich (in which case, why aren’t the Police doing the rounds of suity types with their anti-drug campaigns?) I suspect the next thing we'll see is a very carefully drafted standard lease term "no cannibis" being used by a lot of landlords. Housing NZ not excluded.
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Speaker: We shouldn’t have to look back…, in reply to TracyMac,
How many non-femme men feel anxious walking along a quiet street at night?
Oh, that one is easy: most of them. Personally one reason that I ride a bike is that I'm much less likely to get attacked (albeit if I am I'm much more likely to die, since the attacker is extremely likely to be using a car as a weapon).
But the reason is the same as for women in many ways, they're afraid they'll meet a violent man. Or men. Because they realise that most violence by women occurs in the home, or while wearing gang insignia (police uniforms are a favourite).
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Speaker: We shouldn’t have to look back…, in reply to Emma Hart,
always boils down to the thing they were objecting to in the first place: it's because Men are Trash
That's the bit that gets me. "#notallmen but never ever let any man near you because you just don't know".... WTF?
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Up Front: R.O.A.R., in reply to mark taslov,
only to come second to a biologically stronger athlete
Not to mention that that is the entire point of athletics competitions.
The trouble is, as we're seeing, that the question "what is a woman" is not one that has a simple answer with a clear line between "woman" and "non-woman". Blaming organising bodies at any level for not managing to come up with a simple, unambiguous test for that is silly.
Mark, I'm not suggesting you're doing those things, just trying to point out that the underlying premises don't stack up.
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Up Front: It's Beginning to Look a Lot…, in reply to Emma Hart,
Emma, I'm sorry. I was trying to avoid derailing but felt that TracyMac needed a response. I'm not going to engage with you, our experiences around this time are both very stressful, but also different to the point of being opposed. My "don't participate" is your "destroy christmas".
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FWIW I've told my family that I'm going back to Aotearoa for some funerals and possibly when I retire. Anything else comes under the heading of "I think catastrophic global warming is a problem we should avoid. We all have to stop flying ASAP".
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Up Front: It's Beginning to Look a Lot…, in reply to TracyMac,
f you're not a willing participant, then I'd suggest not participating at all. It seems better to me than being an unwilling participant and going on passive-aggressive strike when asked to share the labour.
That was exactly what I suggested in the first place, and Emma objected on the basis that participation is not optional. I don't "passive aggressive" this one, hence the "how about you stop trying to make me miserable" response. The effort I make is in the direction of not telling people to fuck off. If I don't make it people notice.
I've decided that pitching in once a year isn't too bad in the greater scheme of things
Which is your decision, and I respect that. A little respect back in the direction of people who want very much not to participate wouldn't go amiss. Just try to imagine for a second that what you're reading isn't a declaration of sulking and passive-aggression, say.
My suggestion that people doing the organising try to unwind a little and focus less on making every christmas the biggest, bestest christmas ever is genuine. I have seen it help other people.
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Up Front: It's Beginning to Look a Lot…, in reply to Emma Hart,
From my point of view, it's because I loathe christmas and only participate under duress. I am way too familiar with the "I am doing so much work, you could at least help" argument being made in the context of "to make you miserable" and the reasonable answer of "how about you just stop trying to make me miserable" is met with further unpleasantness.
That might not have been your intention, and it's certainly not your expressed point of view, but I do think it's worth questioning whether the people you're asking to help you actually share your goal. I assume you sat down with your immediate family and discussed it and agreed on a plan, but I'm not entirely convinced that everyone you're complaining about was included in that.
To me this is very much like "we are hosting a swingers convention and you must attend". Saying "but it's your family" isn't a positive...